Aesthetics (a music video)

Lately I’m thinking about aesthetics. How important they are. Good aesthetics can be like salt, they give us some kind of pleasure.

So, I thought of paying more attention and gather mu favorites here!

For today, I chose an amazing video, directed by Ryan Smith. It’s for Yelawolf’s “Best Friend”, a collaboration with Eminem.

The synthesis of the frames, the color palette, the eerie element, everything combined! Just amazing!

Living with OCD (no.24)

I would like to think of myself as a high functioning OCD person (as I have said before I don’t like the term “sufferer”).

I’m diagnosed, I’m in therapy, and I do the best I can to live without it being in the way.

And that’s the theme for today’s post!

I’m wondering who else feels this way.

The outsiders, even if they really try to understand, or have been through similar situations, they can never truly realize what’s going on inside an OCD mind….!

For example, I do have my daily tasks/compulsions that I HAVE TO DO, but in the same time I do the things I want, and have a functioning everyday life.

It has a lot to do with balance. I have found ways to balance the obsessive ideas, without letting them stop me from anything. And this balance isn’t always the easiest thing to do. It has taken so much time to reach this point, and there’s so much work so I can keep up and continue using it daily.

And all this energy…! Basically each day takes a lot of energy.

A bunch of tricks and mechanisms help a lot.

It’s all combined, so my OCD can be something that I have and not a prison.

And there are the days that this system is not so efficient. And then, again, it’s time, work, energy, etc.

It can get really exhausting.

And no matter what a person outside yourself can see, it’s just a glimpse of the real thing that lives inside your brain.

But, as I always like to say, there’s only one way and that’s keep going on…!

The ones & the one life

[I haven’t always been treated in the best way possible by others. I have been in an emotionally abusive relationship in the past, I have let people treat me as it suited them sometimes. And I’m changing all that. I’m in the process of doing it, have done some great progress so far…!]

And I’m living this small manifesto here:

  • Let go of people. We change, we learn and someone may not be the best match for us anymore. If you feel like something doesn’t feel good, maybe it’s time for change.
  • Change is our friend, your friend. Yes, change makes us feel uncomfortable sometimes, but it brings new things that chances are, they’re gonna be better than the ones in our past.
  • Nothing happens inside your comfort zone. Well, I know it’s fucking scary sometimes, when you have to make that step to get outside your comfort zone. But pieces of magic live there!
  • Find people that bring the best out of you, that calm and excite you in the right ways. Find people that make you feel comfortable, and people that never make you feel bad for being yourself! And be honest and your true self with them. And show them your love. And keep them in your life.
  • Have people in your life that you can truly connect with.
  • Have an open mind; for everything. But also have your limits and protect them if necessary. Find your balance.
  • Remember how an honest conversation with another person can open your heart and your mind.
  • Try to let go of the control. Or relax about controlling yourself, things, life, others. Sorry, there are extremely few things you can actually control.
  • That face, that human that’s looking straight back at you from the mirror, smile to her/him. And love her/him till death do you part.
  • And have fun in the meantime!

The Polly Pocket effect

[A photo with flash, because if I was a kid and wanted to shoot a thing in the dark I would put flash (and not the proper lighting).]

As an adult I have played with toys and games from my childhood, watched shows and movies from my childhood. But, of course, nothing feels the same while not being a kid anymore.

So, a few days before I saw that Mattel relaunched the original Polly Pocket, the tiny ones. I went to a store to check them out and I bought one, since I have none from when I was a kid.

It’s the exact, same, feeling…! The miniature efffect, the gesture of placing the figurine in the proper place so it can stand still on its own, the proportions, the compact case, the tiny tiny accessories and how they don’t fit all inside the case and you extend your play/installation outside it. A microcosm inside a small case!

All those feelings hit me, it was so moving. Remembered exactly how it was to play with Polly Pockets as a kid! Like in the movies when the character finds a childhood toy and it all comes back to her/him. (Well, then a not so pleasant related memory hit me too, but this was like the horror movies where they say that when you open a connection to the other world evil things may enter as well.)

Now the Polly Pocket is sitting near me in my art studio. I chose one that is a sewing atelier, so it’s close (I’m into sewing too).

A piece of my childhood self that after all seems it has become a part of me.

P.S. Here’s an older Polly Pocket related story, here!